I don't know why it took until now, but today it hit me like a ton of bricks: I HAVE A FEAR OF EVOLVING. Maybe this doesn' t make total sense, but I will try to explain. I have always been a perfectionist at anything I put my mind to. Art is one of those things where there is no right or wrong, yes or no answers. People like different things. When you feel you are totally happy with what you are doing, you look back on it a few years later and think "Wow, I've grown so much as an artist." This is where my fear comes in. I put a lot of myself into every single painting or piece of art I create. Will people see that when they view my work? Will people who own my art want their money back down the road because their painting isn't as good as my latest work? Silly, I know! Actually writing this fear down seems so much sillier and less debilitating than in my head.
So, now what do I do about it? Tonight while cleaning out and rearranging my art space, I found the top image. This was the first exercise in my first painting class in college. Amazingly, it survived four moves along the way. We were to experiment with different techniques and different materials for each square. Even after years of projects, this exercise is one of my favorite memories of college. To try to get over my fear and incorporate new ideas into my art, I will experiment everyday, even if it's the tiniest bit. So now I ask you what is that one fear you have and how can you work through it?
Hi Kristina, I've the same problem earlier, thinking that people might not want to but this current painting but keep waiting for the future ones bcos it's better. or like what you said. wanting their money back. It's such a silly idea. Maybe we're artists bcos we're so crazy creative.
ReplyDeleteBcos then I realized each piece of artwork is precious bcos it represents the state of our being at that moment. And without being who we are in the past, we can't be who we in the present. I understand where you're coming from, but I say celebrate your past, present and future, it's a scary thing to see ourselves constantly changing and it's reasonable to be fearful. But we need to keep moving forward and aspire to be better.
For me, my fear is that nobody will take me and my art seriously. But I'm moving past that as I am more sure each day that my art matters!
You're very brave to want to experiment everyday, and I love that collage. Do keep painting and challenge yourself, let's evolve together!